My Fourth Season

Hot Ones

Happy thursday, everybody. As I mentioned in tuesday’s review, it’s now september and that means that we’re overdue for round four of my Hot Ones-style line-up. That set of ten sauces, that I update annually, designed to give you the best UK-centric replica of the show’s experience that I can.

I am, after all, a UK chilli reviewer. Which puts me in the perfect position to craft such a collection.

This year, however, I’ve been somewhat disappointed by the products showcased on First We Feast. They haven’t interested me nearly as much as those in past seasons.

So, instead of looking at what the real show does and trying to mimic it, I’m going to try and whip up the wildest collection of wing-friendly, ascending heat sauces that I can, this time.

But, if you are after a more traditional line-up, there’s always the Chilli Shop and Mojo’s Bar’s monthly 📽️Hot Ones challenge night📽️, here in leeds.

Hopefully, between that and today’s post, I’ve got all of the bases covered.

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Pineapples and Pain

It’s monday, dear readers, and, while it might not be my usual blogging day, it is, in fact, my birthday. The day where I turn a year older and I mark the occasion with something stupidly hot. An extract-based sauce or two to make me suffer for your entertainment, as well as the entertainment of those who craft such fearsome concoctions.

As I mentioned, last week, this year’s post is dedicated to Dan Reed and his company, Chilli of the Valley. A company who kindly supplied me with one of their hottest natural products as an appetiser.

Yet I kind of suspect that that’s all that Dan meant for his Black Death to be. Because it may have been hot and tasty but it sure didn’t pack the unnatural punch of a sauce like this:

PhwoarBottle

His Phwoar Koff and Dai.

Not that it’s actually meant to be read as “Phwoar Koff and Dai” but, well, I do try to keep things family friendly on my front page. And I’m sure that we’ll all understand what it really means once we’ve tried it.

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Pedestrian Hot Wings

What’s up fiery food fans? If you’ve spent any time on this site at all, you probably know that I’m a fan of the Hot Ones YouTube show but, as of this week, the brand are branching out.

hot-ones-game-show

Hot Ones the Game Show just dropped yesterday – A variation on the formula where, instead of interviewing celebrity guests over a shared meal of lightly-sauced (yet still very hot) wings, Sean Evans asks trivia questions of the general american public, while they suffer from something far more thoroughly drenched.

So, today, I want to take some time to look at that formula and give my thoughts on what it does right, what it does wrong and what it’s likely to mean for the future of the show that I love.

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Hot Ones Round Three

Happy thursday, folks. Today, we’re back for round three of my Hot Ones-style line-up.

Hot Ones

Because, given the popularity of the show, I feel like it’s worth making an annual tradition out of. Especially when importing some of their actual sauces can be quite the struggle.

So here I am, yet again, to provide you with a more brit-friendly alternative, comprised entirely of sauces that are available in the UK. Sauces that I have featured on this very site and know will make for the most enjoyable and entertaining of challenges.

You can read all about last year’s choices in my previous post but, this year, I’m going to be refreshing most of the line-up, oncemore. So, as with the last time, read on to see which old sauces have stayed, what new ones have made my list and why I’ve made the decisions that I have.

Or watch 📽️ my YouTube videos 📽️ to see me tackle a line-up of real Hot Ones sauces.

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Hot & Bothered

It’s my birthday again! Today, I turn twenty-seven and, like every other year, I rate some extract sauces. Ultra-hot chilli products that surpass the natural limits of my scale by using a chemical concentrate of chilli’s capsaicin.

So, while I would normally bring you a recipe post on a weekend, like this, I’m putting my cooking on hold for a bonus review of my annual suffering.

Yet I have something a little different for you, this year. A sauce that comes not from an artisan chilli company but from the garlic specialists of the Isle of Wight:

BotherBottle

The Garlic Farm’s fang melting “Vampire Botherer” – To my knowledge, the only ever craft sauce to blend green chilli and chilli extract.

It’s not going to be as insane as today’s other item, given that a mere tenth of a percent of it is actually capsaicin concentrate, but I feel like its uniqueness is worth addressing, before I dive head first into the real deep end of the Five Finger Death Punch.

FFDPSauce

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Mad Dog Burger Topper

Howdy, peeps, it’s recipe day again and, while I don’t plan on doing this every week, I do have another mini one for you today. One that makes use of Mad Dog’s 25th Anniversary Gold Edition.

Why? Because something has to.

It’s a tasty sauce. A great blend of mellowed out reapers, scorpions and ghosts that even tastes rather mexican. It’s gentle on the palate but not even remotely gentle on the rest of the body. A brutal assault on one’s sense of heat at a freakin’ crazy

45/10

A heat that renders it inedible for all but the most hardcore of chilli lovers and was enough to send me and my friends loopy 📽️ with a single mozzarella stick 📽️.

So it should come as no surprise that I’ve barely touched my bottle since. I just don’t want that kind of mouth-hurting, mind-destroying challenge spice very often and my video reviews more than satiate any such need that I might have.

It is, therefore, about time I toned it down a bit. Made a secondary sauce out of it that’s only super hot, not beyond nature. Something that at least the crazy people, like me, might enjoy.

Here it is, my Mad Dog burger topper recipe.

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Bang Bang into the Ring

Hey there folks, today we’ve got a little surprise freebie. A certain something from a company that needed no special introduction post because they only make the one product.

It’s an interesting one, though, and a pretty big name to boot:

BBCO

This is Matt Tangent’s Bang Bang Chilli Oil and I’ve been wanting to talk about it for a while but there’s a second little something today that I’ve wanted to mention for even longer: The little bottle on the side that inspired Matt’s signature creation.

akabanga

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Return of the Wings

Happy thursday again, folks.

Today, we’re taking another look at my Hot Ones-style line up because it’s been a whole year. Time in which the range of sauces I can pull from has changed quite dramatically. Yet my love for the show has not.

Hot Ones

You can read all about that and see what the old line up was in last year’s post but, this time, we’re focusing solely on the sauces. So read on for what new ones I’ve chosen, which old ones have stayed and why I’ve made the decisions that I have.

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Dying in Style

Well, it’s my birthday again but it might not be a happy one. Not when you’ve chosen what was probably the hottest and definitely the most expensive option on my poll.

This year’s extract sauce tasting is unlikely to be as brutal as 🔥 my first year’s 🔥 but I’m sure that it’ll at least give last year a run for its money. And it is, once again, two sauces.

Two sauces that I can’t show you until after the “Continue reading” button because one of them uses the F-word.

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Murder Me!

Hey guys, it’s coming to the end of may and my birthday’s just under a month away.

You know what that means. It means extract sauce! Sauce that’ll melt my face off with a single cocktail stick.

There’s only one problem. I haven’t been sent any to review lately.

So, this year, I have to pick my own poison and I just can’t do it. So, to make things both easier and more fun, I’m going to let you guys have a bit of a say.

I’m going to let you pick from three company’s unnaturally hot concoctions – Ones that I’ve been eyeing up throughout the year – and choose the one that kills me. All you have to do is read the rest of this post and vote in the poll at the end.

Assuming, of course, that you’re ok with strong language.

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